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Cast Abbey Lerman ..... Apple Store Girl Adam Tomei ..... No. 35 Austyn Myers ..... Josh Morrison Brandon Molale ..... Security Guard Charles Guardino ..... Sergeant Vargas Craig Gellis ..... Robber #1 David Goldsmith ..... Lieutenant Buttocks Ed Helms ..... No. 2 – 2nd In Command Eddie Murphy ..... Dave Ming Cheng / The Captain Elizabeth Banks ..... Gina Morrison Floyd Levine ..... Old Man On Toilet Gabrielle Union ..... No. 3 – Cultural Officer Jane Altman ..... Old Woman Janine Edwards ..... Apple Store Girl Jim Turner ..... Doctor Judah Friedlander ..... Engineer Kevin Hart ..... No. 17 Kristen Connolly ..... Make Out Girl Larry Purtell ..... Taxi Driver Marc Blucas ..... Mark Rhodes Michael Izquierdo ..... Make Out Guy Mike O'Malley ..... Officer Knox Nick Berman ..... Young Bully Pat Kilbane ..... No. 4 – Security Officer Philip Pavel ..... Old Navy Salesman Richie Allan ..... Homeless Man Scott Caan ..... Officer Dooley Smith Cho ..... Lieutenant Left Leg Stephanie Venditto ..... MRI Technician Tim Sitarz ..... Robber #2 Yung-I Chang ..... Apple Genius Yvette Nicole Brown ..... Old Navy Saleswoman

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